Author How to avoid perfection trap in a relationship  (Read 1425 times)

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Offline oneluv

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How to avoid perfection trap in a relationship
« on: May 09, 2012, 07:36:04 AM »
As the love relationship advice story tells, the perfection trap occurs when we try to find perfection outside of ourselves.

Does this mean we shouldn't try to find perfection in our relationships?
I think not! Perfection is a nobel aim within the context of relationships.

Perhaps one lesson in the Sufi story is that perfection is the ability to accept the imperfect.

An old Sufi story captures the essence of the "perfection trap" that undermines not only new, but relationships that are well established.

"One afternoon, a man and his friend escaped the afternoon's sun in the cafe, drinking tea and talking about life and love.
"How come you never got married?" asked his friend
'Well..." the man said with a deep reflective thought that seemed to carry him back to a younger day.
"...to tell you the truth, I spent my youth looking for the perfect woman. In Cairo, I met a beautiful and intelligent woman, with eyes like dark olives but she was unkind.

Then in Baghdad, I met a woman who was a wonderful and generous soul, but we had no interests in common. One woman after another would seem just right, but there would always be something missing. Then one day, I met her. She was beautiful, intelligent, generous and kind. We had everything in common. In fact she was perfect."

"Well," said the man's friend, "What happened? Why didn't you marry her?"
The man sat back and sipped his tea reflectively. "Well," he replied, "It's a sad thing. Seems she was looking for the perfect man."

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NaijaSky

How to avoid perfection trap in a relationship
« on: May 09, 2012, 07:36:04 AM »

Offline oneluv

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Re: How to avoid perfection trap in a relationship
« Reply #1 on: May 09, 2012, 07:40:00 AM »
"In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing. The worst thing you can do is nothing." - Theodore Roosevelt

 
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NaijaSky

Re: How to avoid perfection trap in a relationship
« Reply #1 on: May 09, 2012, 07:40:00 AM »


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