Marriage Tips

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Yesterday at 06:37:58 AM by Isaac Adeniran

Be patient while you read this…
If you are a young and ambitious dude still
struggling to get to the top,
this write-up will save you the stress and pains
of the so-called love we
have been deceived about for long!
If you still think that there’s what is called ‘true
love’ or ‘love without
money or resources’, then you must be living in
a fool’s paradise!!!
(Quote me if you like!)
The truth of the matter is that what people in the
past enjoyed as ‘true
love’ no longer exist. Then it was possible for a
man and a woman to fall
in love based on personal qualities or characters
without materialism
attached to it! Those were the good old days!
Our society has changed and
any one who still lives in the past is not better
than the village !!!
I have heard people saying often times that love
or relationship is not all
about money! To me, that’s the highest level of
trash and rubbish! If you
are a young man with ambition, still striving and
toiling to make it, you
better forget about love and concentrate full-
time…I mean 100% on your
dreams and life.
It is so frustrating to see some struggling dudes
killing themselves over love
issues! What a life! Why spend the meagre salary
you earn after working
for 30 days like a donkey on a girl? She tells you
she needs a phone, you
struggle to buy it! She says she needs money for
hair, you struggle to give
her! She tells you she needs to get a nice bag or
pair of shoes she saw at
a boutique, you struggle to give her! Be rest
assured that you will
continue to struggle endlessly in your life if you
don’t desist from such
shameful and wasteful act! If you want to know
the extent to which
materialism has eaten into this so-called love,
watch even the younger girls
of today! Even those that are below 21 or 22 will
quickly run away from
you if you can’t be giving her upkeep money,
money for hair and phone,
If you don’t live comfortably well, sorry, you are
on your own!!! Except
for those village girls that are not exposed…but
seriously, not in the cities
of Nigeria.
Before you criticize me on the fact that these
women need to live a
comfortable life by hanging out with only
comfortable dudes, read the topic
again! It is surely the same reason why I said
young struggling men
should forget about love and focus on their
lives!!! When you are
comfortable, you can have the resources to
sustain your relationship because
no matter how a woman ‘loves’ you, the ‘love’
must surely die if there’s no
finance to sustain it!
xx Why a woman should not dance in some overrated ego
January 06, 2018, 11:31:39 AM by naijatowns
I am 32 years old. Me and my ex hubby dated for six years, I started dating him whilst I was in grade 12, I was 19 years old. We were best of friends, I waited until he completed college and started work, my family and his family then met, we got married and had a son. (7 years old now).

My husband was short tempered at times, but our problems started when I wanted to make him feel he can’t control me. Every time we argue, I would pack my bags, go to my family and explain. My sisters would phone my husband and shout at him. If he is controlling me I would always dare him that if you wish divorce me- I never wanted divorce, I just had pride and I never wanted to look a lose in his eyes.

One day I pushed him so had that for the first time he beat me and lock me out side, I went to my family, my family took him to police, every time I looked like I am being abused! But to be honest, I used to abuse my husband emotionally.

He was arrested and detained. I was asked by his family to withdraw the case, I felt that what I was doing is wrong.
My husband was never a violent man, he did what he did because I pushed him to the wall. Of which he openly knelt down and apologized. I withdrew the charge, and we reconciled.
After three months, I packed my bags after a small issue, and he remained alone. After two days I received a call that he is in hospital, my family told me that I shouldn’t go there because it will look like am begging him, and my sisters believed he is faking the illness.

All this time, people felt sorry for me like I was the one being abused. He spent a week in hospital, after he came out, I just received a divorce summon. I wanted to say no to divorce, but because I felt this pride, I wanted him to change his mind and beg me, I called him and say he will get the divorce because I live like am in hell.

When we went to court, I wanted to make him pay, so I told the court that I needed his properties to be shared. To my surprise he openly told the court that whatever he and me acquired together should be given to me, all he wanted was divorce.

We got divorced in 2009 July. Now, this Saturday my husband is getting married again, whilst I am here wasted! My family are gossiping about me, I depend on what my ex gives to my son for survival. I know I wasted my marriage. I am here telling all wives to be careful how you get advise. Don’t be cheated. Even my young sisters are much more respected than me. Those who encouraged me to divorce are always bad mouthing me.
There is no benefit in pride!

This a perfect example and advise for those dancing in some overrated ego. Share it with your friends.

January 06, 2018, 07:31:23 AM by naijatowns
1. Rejecting food when there's an issue:
Mr husband, you gave your wife money for
food and after it was prepared you refused
to eat because you are angry. It's one of the greatest signs of immaturity, it's time to grow up! You should not even abandon your home for any reason. You could go somewhere when angry but ensure that you don't allow it to linger unnecessarily because that is enough for the devil to build on even though some women can be really troublesome.
2. Telling your wife severally that you are the head:
May I let you know that even when your wife disobeys/ disrespect you she still knows that you are the head. You need not shout or scream it daily. Or do we need to get you a slot on CNN? It's important for you to know when and how to be firm and put your feet down over issues, however don't become a nagging husband just to prove that you are the head.
3. Issuing threats:
beating, verbally abusing
your wife, issuing threats of divorce or
bragging about marrying another wife does
not make you a man. An EMPTY barrel makes the loudest noise. Your strength is in your ability to tame your tongue and control your fist. When she is acting her "childish woman" part, play the "matured man."
4. Reporting your wife to friends and family:
When your wife offends you, correct
and talk things through. You don't have to tell everyone about her mistakes, that will paint her black and sell her cheap such that you will not be able to redeem her back.
By the way, are you a reporter answer my question ?
5. Keeping malice:
is it not funny to know that some men keep malice? Some of them even nag, criticise, abuse and call their wives names in public. It may make you look like a "big boy" who's in control but you are not going to gain anything good from it, your home will only be a den of insults and confrontations.
6. Not helping with house chores:
I must say here that it is the sole responsibility of a woman to tend and manage a home.
However, it's not a bad thing if a man lends a helping hand when necessary. Watching football with newspaper in your hand every evening, not caring how stressful the house chores are will only increase the pressure on your wife and if you truly care you'll help, just checking on her while busy could encourage and sooth her, this also makes you a good example to the kids especially the boys. Some men don't even say "thank You" to their wives after eating, all they do is compare her with other women. It's a shame that after having 3-4 kids some
men cannot change a simple diaper or
prepare cereal meals; a big shame.
My point?
A REAL man is a pillar of support to his wife, not a hole of depression.
thumbup Marriage tips for couples in 2018
December 30, 2017, 01:27:58 PM by naijatowns
Marriage indeed is one of the biggest investments in human existence; just like every new beginning, it started as a seed which needed a lot of nurturing and preservations to ensure its steady growth and success. During the process, it is also predestined to experience several transformations which can be good or bad depending on the choices you make as individuals or as a couple. Lives will be confronted with setbacks and behind every smile are more than a thousand pains sometimes too deep to comprehend.

2017 has certainly left its own memories in your hearts nevertheless you must both try your best to remain optimistic no matter how insignificant the present may seem. Here are a few words of wisdom to kick-off your marital lives in the coming year.

Don’t give up

Marriage has the capacity to mend broken hearts and the tendency to prevent further heartbreaks. It also has the inclinations to change your views and perceptions of the past therefore cultivate a positive attitude and thankful hearts in every situation. Focus on your strengths but also embrace your weaknesses too as marriage gives you the freedom to become vulnerable with your spouse in exchange for care and protection.

Take single steps

One of the most famous Chinese proverbs says; a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step; start taking small steps in the right directions if great big steps have made you stumble in the past. Each step you take will reveal a totally new you even though the journey may be challenging in the beginning but with sacrifice, commitment, self-motivation and a continuous passage of learning, you will both be working towards building a better and fulfilled marriage life together.

Hate is destructive

In the words of Marianne Williamson ‘We are not held back by the love we didn’t receive in the past, but by the love we are not extending in the present’. Do not bottle up animosity from a past relationship or with your spouse for a wrong committed, you will be destroying yourselves silently, even though you cannot alter the past,  do not allow hate and regrets to rub you of a greater future together in your marriage.

Forgiveness is divine

Stop dwelling on your mistakes and stop searching for answers you may never find; when you both make mistakes, do not dwell on them. Forgiveness is a powerful thing, even though it doesn’t change the past but it has the capacity to reform the future, always forgive because forgiveness is divine and it can make your troubled marriage whole again.

Life is too short

Arguments and Grudges are just a waste of time and a total deprivation of love and happiness in your marriage. When you merge the good and the bad together, you will both learn to appreciate the privilege you have both been given to live and love because life is just too short to live it in misery and regrets.


Even though you cannot take back the troubles of yesterday, but you can both start looking forward to a more rewarding life together in the • New Year when you both put love first coupled with the wisdom which is profitable to direct in every great marriage. Wish you all a Fruitful Year Ahead.
xx Why It's good to appreciate our partners despite their flaws.
December 20, 2017, 01:12:31 PM by abejoye

I am writing to you in order to make someone understand that it's good to appreciate our partners despite their flaws.

I am 32 years of age.

My ex husband and I dated for 6 years.

We where best of friends.

I waited until he completed college and started work.

My family and his family then met.

We got married and had a son. (7 years old now).

My husband was short tempered at times but our problems started when I wanted to make him feel he couldn't control me.

Every time we argued, I would pack my bags, go to my family and explain.

My sisters would phone my husband and shout at him.

If he was controlling me I would always dare him that if he wished, he could divorce me.

I never wanted divorce.

I just had pride and I never wanted to look like a loose woman in his eyes.

One day I pushed him so hard that for the first time he beat me and locked me outside.

I went to my family, my family took him to the police, every time I looked like I was being abused!

But to be honest, I used to abuse my husband emotionally.

He was arrested and detained.

I was asked by his family to withdraw the case.

I felt that what I was doing was wrong.

My husband was never a violent man, he did what he did because I pushed him to the wall of which he openly knelt down and apologized.

I withdrew the charge, and we reconciled.

After three months, I packed my bags after a small issue and he remained alone.

After two days, I
received a call that he was in the hospital.

December 03, 2017, 09:37:46 AM by abejoye

A woman in Yola, Adamawa State took her husband's Phone and checked his Facebook activities; she saw romantic chats with women. She sat down and thought of a way to separate him from the women. She came up with a beautiful idea, without even the husband's knowledge. She came up with the following methods

1- She copied all his chats with one of the women.

2- She opened a new Facebook account with a Male name.

3- She sent a friend request to the husband, he accepted the request.

4 - She introduced herself to him. She said "I'm Abu Dar'daee by name, a Member of BOKO HARAM.  I saw all your chats with my wife. I want to warn you to stay away from her if you really want to remain alive. To clear any element of doubt, I have all the chats  with me and here they are,  you can see.

5- So, if you don't stop chatting with my wife, I'll slaughter you like Ram.
6- I know you. I know your name is Jamilu, your father's name is Mohammed, your mother's name Khadija,  you have 3 children.  Al'ameen, Zahara and Yusuf. Abdulrahman is your best friend and Usman is your neighbor. You are a Lecturer working at FCE.  You also go to work 9:30am with your friend Usman,  you follow Jambutu street and you spend time together. I'm warning you if you dare call,  text or chat with my wife again, I will slaughter you like a Ram as I said earlier".

The wife was close to him while he read the message. As he was reading it, he kept sniffing and repeating Innalillahi WA innaillaihirraji'un. She asked him what happened, he said nothing. He immediately deleted his Facebook and Whatsapp apps and every other social media app.

The following morning, he went and sold the phone in the market and bought an ordinary Nokia. He told his wife to always wake him when ever it's time for prayers.

The woman said since that day, her husband has been observing prayers regularly and spending more time with the family.

Isn't that better than settling the matter with a knife?
xx Am I still a virgin
December 02, 2017, 01:09:35 AM by Isaac Adeniran
A young woman sent me a message. She is about to get married. She had told her fiancé that she was a virgin. But the problem was that, she didn't know whether she was still a virgin.
When she was 13 years old, she was raped. A man grabbed her and forced himself on her. But someone came along and rescued her. The act only happened for 10 seconds.
So, she was afraid her fiancé might think she lied to him when  they finally have sex and she didn't show sign of a virgin.
So, she came to me distraught.
I asked her if she had seen her vagina before. Her answer was no. I told her to use a mirror and look at her vagina.
She later sent me a message:
"I just looked at my virgina now for the first time in my life with a mirror, I did not understand a thing and I can not see any opening where an object as big as a men penis will penetrate
To be frank I don't know the part of the virgina where the penis penetrate
So many things to learn...."
Then I sent her images to use in comparing her vagina. I told her not to worry, everything will be alright as long as I am involved.
I get a lot of messages like that one from virgins. Both male and female virgins. Men about to marry virgins and women about to marry virgins and virgin couples who are confused as hell.
And about to wed couples who have sexual issues and questions. or newly married couples who are grappling with sexual questions.
So, I have decided to gather these good people together and give them a special package: WhatsApp Virgo's Forum.
This welcomes those about to get married; singles seeking information; newly married; those who want to know.
This class will be interactive, with images videos etc. It will span for a week and includes short counseling from me for those with special problems. The fee is quite affordable (2000 naira).
For more info WhatsApp me @ 08033181698
You don't have to worry anymore!
...invest in romance!
xx Do these to get peace in your marriage
November 20, 2017, 04:40:37 AM by Isaac Adeniran

1. I want peace in my marriage. That is why I listen to my wife and give her attention. A wife doesn't become a nag out of choice but as a reaction to her feeling neglected and unappreciated. If a husband doesn't want his wife to nag, all he has to do is love her and give her time

2. I want peace in my marriage. That is why I protect my spouse from misunderstandings with my parents and siblings. One of the biggest causes of lack of peace is when your spouse and in laws are in conflict. As the husband/wife, you are the bridge and key to her/him having better in law relations

3. I want peace in my marriage. That is why I make love to my spouse often. Making love has a way of reducing tensions in marriage. A healthy sex life leads to a peaceful sleep

4. I want peace in my marriage. That is why I am not only faithful, but also I deliberately do nothing that will make my spouse suspect I am unfaithful. Suspicion causes lack of peace. I am open and transparent

5. I want peace in my marriage. This is why I pray with my spouse daily. Our home is a house of prayer, our bedroom is an altar. We pray for the peace from God that is beyond human understanding

6. I want peace in my marriage. This is why my spouse and I work hard so that we have enough money. Poverty can bring about rifts in a couple, when there is surplus, a couple tends to be stress free. Poverty and laziness is not our portion

7. I want peace in my marriage. This is why I play worship music in our home more. When the home is filled with worship, peace is in plenty

8. I want peace in my marriage. This is why I have learnt to let things go, not to pick up fights with my spouse, not to argue, not to be hot tempered

9. I want peace in my marriage. This is why I keep off friends who are anti-marriage, friends who talk badly about my spouse, friends who are antagonistic towards my spouse or friends who might mislead me

10. I want peace in my marriage. This is why I tell off any one who dares to flirt with me besides my spouse, I tolerate no advances from anyone, I publicly acknowledge my spouse and I rebuke or block anyone who dares to come in between my spouse and I

11. I want peace in my marriage. This is why I do my best to make my spouse feel secure and respected. I make sure that my spouse is sure of my love. I tell my spouse "I love you" often because those three words soothe the heart

xx 10 golden secrets of marriage
November 20, 2017, 03:41:18 AM by Isaac Adeniran
Only God has no weakness. Every rose flower has its
own thorn. If you focus too much on your spouse's
weakness, you can't get the best out of his/her strength.
No one is an Angel, therefore, avoid digging one's past.
What matters is the present life of your partner. Old
things are passed away. try to forgive and forget. The
past can't be change. So Focus on the present and the
Marriage is not bed of roses. Every shinning marriage
has gone through its own test of hot and excruciating
fire. True love is proved in time of challenge. Fight for
your marriage! Make up your mind to stay with your
spouse in time of needs. Remember this is the vow you
made on your wedding day!
Don't compare your marriage with anyone! We can
never be equal, some will be far in front and others far
behind. To avoid marriage stresses, be patient, work
hard and with time, your marriage dreams shall come
When you marry, you must declare a war against
enemies of marriage. Some of the enemies of marriage
are: Ignorance, Prayerlessness, Unforgiveness, Adultery,
Third Party Influence, Stinginess, Stubbornness, Lack Of
Love, Rudeness, Wife battery, Laziness, Divorce etc. Be
ready to fight to maintain your marriage zone.
There is no ready made marriage anywhere. Marriage is
hard work, volunteer yourself and perfect it daily.
Marriage is like a CAR with Gear oil, gear box, back
hassles and If this parts are not properly maintained,
the car will brake down somewhere along the road and
exposing the occupant to unhealthy circumstances. -
Many of us are careless about our marriage... Are you?
If you are, pls pay attention to your marriage.
He (God) gives you, him or her in the form of raw
materials in order for you to mould what you desire.
You may desire a woman who can pray for 1 hours but
your wife can only pray for 30 minutes. With your love,
prayer and encouragement, she can improve.
You cannot predict what will happen after marriage, as
situation may change, so, leave a room for adjustment.
Pregnancy may not come in the next 4 years. You may
get married to her because she's slim but she becomes
100% fatter after a child. He may lose his beautiful job
for years that you have to take the financial
responsibility of the family until he gets a new job. But
with God by your side, you will smile at last.
Marriage needs total commitment, love is the glue that
makes a couple stick together. Divorce starts in the
mind. Never think of divorce! Never threaten your
spouse with divorce. Choose to remain married! God
hates divorce
Marriage is like a bank account. It is the money you
deposit into your bank account that you can
withdrawn. If you don't deposit love, peace and care
into your marriage, you are not a candidate of a blissful
home. There is no free love in marriage, You cannot
love without giving and sacrificing.
May God Give us The Grace And Wisdom To Build A
Heaven on Earth Marriage.
xx In happy family both wife and husband are always wrong
October 14, 2017, 01:55:12 AM by Isaac Adeniran

There were two houses standing next to each other. In one of them resided a very unhappy family. The spouses yelled at each other, they fought and quarreled all the time. The other was a place of happiness and calm.

During one of the fights a wife asked her husband:

“Did you ever hear them quarrel or yell over at that house? No!

So, go there and see what they do to avoid it!”

The husband stood at the window of his neighbors and watched. There they were busy doing their own thing. The wife was in the kitchen cooking, and the man sat at the table writing. The phone rang, and the man jumped up and headed to the hallway to get it.

On his way he bumped into a vase, it fell and broke. He got down to his knees and started picking up the pieces. The wife ran into the room from the kitchen. She also kneeled down and started helping her husband to pick them up.

The man said to his wife:

“I am so sorry. I rushed to get the phone and bumped into the vase. It fell and got broken.”

The wife replied:

“No, honey, it is my fault. I put it there on the way. That’s why you bumped into it.”
They kissed, and that was over. Both got back to what they were doing.

The man who watched them returned to his wife. She wanted to know what the secret of their happiness was.

What he said was fantastic:

“I know it now. In their family they both are guilty and in our family both of us are always right!”

That’s the secret of family happiness!

Food for thought.

There are times you need to forfeit your right to win your peace: depends on which you cherish most.

This recipe is applicable, not only in the home, but also at work and in all relationships.

Pls don't just read it. share it. You never can tell how many people this post will bless.
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